A Rock Makes an Excellent Puppy

A rock makes an excellent puppy.
They're practically almost the same.
Except that a puppy's rambunctious;
a rock is a little more tame.

It's true that a rock's not as hyper.
It may not chase after a ball.
And, often as not, when you call it,
it won't even hear you at all.

And maybe it doesn't roll over,
and isn't excited to play,
but rocks always sit when you tell them,
and rocks really know how to stay.

It may sleep a little bit longer.
It probably eats a bit less.
But rocks never pee on the carpet.
You won't have to pick up their mess.

So go ask your folks for a puppy,
and possibly that's what you'll get.
But, still, if you can't have a puppy,
a rock is a pretty good pet.

It doesn't annoy you with barking;
it quietly sits on a shelf.
A rock makes an excellent puppy.
That's what I keep telling myself.

Computer Boot

When I powered my computer on today
it wouldn't boot,
so I tapped it just a little
but it still would not compute.

So I thumped a little harder
hoping that would make it go.
When it didn't help, I hit it with
an even bigger blow.

Then I punched it half a dozen times
which wasn't very smart,
for my knuckles hurt like heck
but my computer didn't start.

So I whacked it with a hammer
and I knocked it over flat,
and I probably should not have clubbed it
with my baseball bat.

But at least I needn't fret about
it booting anymore,
since I booted my computer
down the stairs and out the door.